...But some asshat at 1am rings once then knocks and runs away. I was awoken around one this morning by two very worried looking people that were in fact my children. It took me a minute to put it all together but they said the doorbell rang and then someone knocked. So I made them stay put and I wearily made my way to the living room and peered out the window to absolutely nothing, no people no broken windows or car damage. Everything seemed in order, so I sent everyone back to bed and attempted to get some sleep, which by the way is the story of my life.
When I woke up 5 hours later (have I mentioned I am on vacation?) I headed outside to survey the damage or what ever the hell happened hours previous. Nothing was disturbed and nothing seemed out of order, the only thing that was different from when I first laid my head on the pillow last night was a bright blue pamphlet rolled up and wedged in the handle of my storm door. I took a glance around the neighborhood and it seemed everyone had been visited by this nocturnal pain in the ass.
What could possibly be so important to warrant everyone's attention at such a late hour...was it a call to arms, perhaps a neighborhood watch was starting up, or maybe someone opened a new business and was getting word out (any of these would piss me off but not as much as the thing it actually was).
It was an advertisement for an upcoming session of Vacation Bible School at a local church. What the hell? Really? Now in all honesty I never saw anyone, it could be a coincidence, but I swear I checked all the doors and cars before I went to bed and this small piece of religious advertising was not on the door at midnight when I finally decided to go to bed. So I assume that someone trying to drum up enrollees at the local VBS decided, perhaps last minute-"OH SHIT, I have got to get these flyers out and fast!" Rediculous, I dont even know how to respond....
So I put that behind me and headed out to start my day, unfortunately everyone in my house likes to eat and have clean clothes and such, which meant the wife and I headed to the local Walmart at 7:00am hopefully to beat the July fourth crowd. Nope. It wasn't bad when we went in, but an hour later the Wal-Mart frustration set in. We loaded our basket with the necessities and headed for the checkout, which by now was three or four deep at all of the three open checkout lines. Yes three out of 22 checkout lanes were open, three. In case you missed something I said THREE. And as always I picked the one with the cashier that has to talk through every item that she rings up, and the customer ahead of us was loud and proud and was more than happy to keep up her end of the conversation. So a 45 minute shopping trip turned in to little over an hour and I swear I will never go back, which is BS because it is close and cheap and I have little other options...
Did some yardwork, made some absolutely amazing pulled pork for our July Fourth celebration later. Hit up the fireworks warehouse and tried to get a nap (to no avail). Spent the evening at my oldest daughter's house with her fiance and the wife and other two kiddos. Blasted a bunch of fireworks, ate, laughed and had a very nice evening. Nothing is better than spending time laughing and having fun with the wife and kids, and we had a ball. Now as the 4th turns into the 5th everything is winding down and things are starting to get quiet. So hopefully everyone had a safe and fun Fourth and the weekend brings much of the same, until next time...don't forget Vacation Bible School is starting next week, let no Ding-Dong-Ditch go to waste...
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